Tuesday Morning

Is there enough coffee to get through a day with 2 kids? Did I mention that I have a cold? Again! I thought maybe it was an allergic reaction to my wool sweater yesterday. But no. The headache, sniffles, and general ick lasted long after the sweater came off. My ears feel funky - so I am wearing a ridiculous hat with ear flaps. It happens to be hot pink, cable knit with "braids" hanging from the ears. It's making me feel better maybe because it's so silly. When I see my reflection I chuckle.

All these little annoying colds certainly point to the notion that my body is still recovering from all that we went through last year. It may be that I am in some kind of denial that I am not my full strength. It may just be a stinking cold. So I'm trying to navigate through the days balancing being strong with over-extending. Being normal and taking special care. I do not want to be constantly concerned about my own well being. I just want to be. That's why I just move on with the everyday.

Someone recently commented on my getting up and taking the kids to the pool & generally being "out there" while I was being treated. I can see how one might think that they would hide in their house and have one long pity-party. I think we think we'd do that, but that's so boring. It's so hopeless. So you find a strength and you go out. My belief is that you would do that.

Isn't it more about the strength that Mothers have to have? The strength of women. Of people. Mothers have to care for their kids and in my case, that helped me care for me, too. I don't give cancer the credit for my fight. I give motherhood the credit. Of all the moms that I know, I can't think of one that wouldn't do the same things I did. I took help and I kept moving when I could. We all do that. We do it when we have a cold and we do it in much harsher circumstances, too.

So, I guess I better put on some jeans, take care of the hat-head, and go to the library with my little guy. We'll both feel better for it.