Quick Friday Update

I saw Dr. Schauer, my medical oncology Hero. He gave me a big thumbs-up after checking blood levels, listening to my heart & lungs, and checking out the scars, etc. A MUCH better meeting than my first visit last April. So I'll be seeing them every 6 months or so just to touch base.

It's tough pulling up to the building though, on what was my treatment day (Fridays), and see all those cars filling the "Patient Parking" spots. Of course I was still the youngest patient there. Kevin and I came in with Bailey and I think that people are scratching their heads wondering why we were there. I'm glad that they wonder - I guess it means that I don't look like a cancer patient. But even as good as the news was and as confident as I am in Dr. Schauer and my other doctors & caregivers, I can't deny that I wish we'd never met. Is that awful? Some days I just get angry/sad that this was my journey. But then, sometimes I'm happy that it was me and not my loved ones.

So you see, cancer makes me even more indecisive or schizo(sp?), or whatever. Since I know that I can't change it, I am working on being happy that I came through it healthy and that I can go on and create my future. Some of those silver linings are harder to see some days. I think it's time to buy some balloons and let it go.